Star Trek answers to, "Why did the chicken cross the road?"
Captain James T. Kirk : To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
Chakotay: Whatever its reason, whatever its goals, we should respect its right to cross the road and seek its own spiritual awareness.
Neelix: Actually, Captain, I'm not really familiar with the chickens in this system. But, if you can catch it, I can cook it.
HoloDoc: How should I know? No one tells me anything around here. I didn't even know we added chickens to the crew. All I know is that it would have been nice, BEFORE the chicken went off to the cross the road, if it had remembered to turn me off!
B'Elanna: I'm sure it felt suffocated by all the bleeping regulations of bleeping Starfleet and just couldn't stand it any longer!
Paris: Well, I think that...say, that's a lovely shirt you're wearing.
Harry: I don't know, it's my first mission.
Tuvok: That's not a question we'd prefer to hear from a senior officer. It makes the junior officers nervous.
Janeway: Its primary goal was no doubt to get back to the Alpha Quadrant...and it probably misses its dog.
Kes: It was remembering back to the times when its ancestors crossed roads all the time! They lost those abilities because they stopped using them!
Odo: I don't have the slightest idea--and I don't particularly care...but then, I've never understood ornithoids' need to engage in such pointless behavior.
Quark: Now really, why would I have bribed him to do it so I could make a tidy profit in the station pool? Besides, all I know is that chicken tastes just like tube grubs.
Kira: It was probably being chased by those throw new Exception('Dang'); Cardassians!
The Grand Nagus: Stupid chicken! You don't cross the road all at once! You sneak across it quietly, without anyone noticing! (Inconceivable!)
Gul Dukat: Well, that's a very interesting question...I'm sure we can work out some kind of arrangement to obtain that information that will be to everyone's satisfaction.
Sisko: I don't care -why- it was crossing the road! All I want to know is -why- it left the coop! So it wanted to "get to the other side"--there is only -so far- that my tolerance will go!
O'Brien: No problem, Commander, I'll get right on it.
Dr. Bashir: Who am I to argue with a chicken?
Dax: To get to the other side. Kurzon might have disagreed with me, Tobin I'm sure wouldn't have had a clue,and then there's...
Garak: To get to the other side? Of course not! Do you realize how ridiculous that is? I'm sure it was a simple matter of its farmer expelling it from the coop for...embezzling eggs.
Worf: I don't know. KLINGON chickens do NOT cross roads.
Riker: I don't know why, but I know how: with pleasure, sir.
Troi: It was running...running away from...no, escaping...oh, Captain, it was fleeing from such -pain-!
Dr. Crusher: If there's nothing wrong with the chicken, there must be something wrong with the universe.
Tasha: That depends...was it fully functional?
Wesley: I'm not sure, but I can figure it out if I reroute these systems and reconfigure the warp field and run a complete internal whootchacallit on the computers and...
Barclay: Uh, chicken?!! Where?!!! C-c-c-ommander, did I ever mention my problem with small feathered things?
Geordi: Well, wherever it's going, I'm sure it'll be there in an hour or two--but any later, and it'll be absolutely impossible for it to make it.
Data: The chicken, in observing that it was on the opposite side of the 20th century Terran paved roadway, was aware that its immediate goal should have been to traverse the distance without interception by any kind of combustion-propelled personal transport vehicle, but I am unclear as to why any kind of domesticated fowl should desire to perambulate upon a conveyance normally reserved for the usage of...yes, sir.
Picard: There are four lights!
The Borg: Crossing the road is irrelevant. The chicken will be assimilated.
Hugh the Borg: Is it my friend?
Kirk: You chicken [*Patok!*], you killed my son...YOU chicken [*Patok!*], you killed...my SON...you CHICKEN [*Patok!*]....youkilledmy...son!
Spock: Fasincating, Captain, it seems driven by a beam of pure energy.
Bones: [*Insert profanity here*], I'm a doctor, not an ornithologist!
Scotty: I donna know, Captain, but it's crossing as fast as it can!
Chekov: Of course, you know chickens were originally domesticated by the famous Russian chickenologist, Vladimir Chickovsky, who in 1435.....
Uhura: Shall I open hailing frequencies so you can ask it, sir?
Sulu: Don't call me Tiny!
Khan: With my last breath I spit at the chicken...
Harvey Mudd: Chicken? I don't remember any chicken. No no no, there's been a terrible misunderstanding.
Nurse Chapel: Oh, Spock!
Lwaxana: Oh, Jean-Luc!
V'Ger: To join with the Creator.
Dr. Soran: His heart just wasn't in it. (Scenes of chicken torture with nanoprobes have been edited out.)
Charlie X: Because it didn't want to STAY...STAY...STAY...
Sarek: Sometimes logic fails me where chickens are concerned.
Gene Roddenberry: To boldy go where no one had gone before.